Idaho laws: they're amusing and confusing, but they're ours.
To say the least, some Idaho laws teeter between questionable and quirky. And our recent harvest of sort of stupid and obvious Idaho laws confirms it. Some legislation pertains to our personal safety, and others are more concerned with our appearance or appendages. While a few of these regulations are pretty wonky, at least we know they're fashioned from good intentions...okay, good but strange intentions.
HITCHHIKING. Need a ride? Idaho says it's cool so long as it's not one from a stranger. This law is Idaho leaving nothing to chance. Our legislatures knew this act was a job for Caption Ida-obvious. And now you're obviously aware of our penchant for cheesy jokes. Sorry.
RATTLESNAKES. It's illegal to kill a rattlesnake without the explicit permission of an Idaho state ranger. Do you have their number? Neither do we, so...maybe just avoid rattlesnakes altogether and everything will be hunky-dory.
SKINNY DIPPING. As long as no one sees you in the buff, Idaho looks the other way. As for what we think, if jumping into a lake buck-naked is how you choose to celebrate your body or get your laps in, we're happy for you, friend.
PEEING IN PUBLIC. Zip it up, buttercup! Idaho prefers to keep its private parts and yours, well, private. (**sigh of relief**)
DECAPITATION. Angry with someone? Listen, it happens, just don't lose your head over it...or theirs. The Gem State frowns upon a change of address for your neighbor's think tank.
BOGO SEATBELTS. Too many kids and not enough seat belts? Idaho gives you the green light to seat two people or two kids in the same seatbelt when necessary. While the law allows for it, we're certainly not advocating for it. One person to one seatbelt is how we roll.
A CRIME AGAINST TENNIS. There's zero love for a cyclist who rides their bike across a tennis court. See what we did there? Whether the court is in-use or not, it's illegal. Sounds like some lawmaker never did get over that match.
CHARACTERIZED NAMES. When it comes to naming your baby, Idaho says leave it to the alphabet! No characters or symbols allowed. And really, why would you slap an @ symbol or a ? in your kid's name anyway? Do you preemptively dislike them? If you characterize their name, it would seem so.
NO PUBLIC SEXCAPADES. Idaho says no bumpin' uglies in public outdoor spaces. We're good with that, and we hope you are, too. We do, however, take exception to this one when we're in Idaho's great outdoors. If you and your mate haven't experienced the thrill of knockin' boots in a truck tailgate under a blanket of stars in the mountains in the middle of nowhere, you're missing out.
UNBRIDLED PASSION. Pre-nuptial lovin' is prohibited in the state of Idaho. It's a no ringy, no dingy kind of thing. We can't speak to how this abstinence rule is monitored or enforced, because we simply don't know. Honestly, ignorance is bliss on this one.
Like Vanessa Williams, we went and saved the best for last.
RESTING B*TCH FACE. Smile, sunshine! Or Idaho will give you somethin' to cry about. Sounds a little like our parents in the '90s, right? But back to the point, it's a criminal act to walk around Idaho Falls with a moody mug. So, turn that frown upside down or pay the price!